honest adventures of em

Queer. NYC. Plant-Based. Travels.

Here I am. Sitting  in bed after a long day. Feeling completely content and relaxed.

I went on two bike rides (a total of seven and a half miles), made some avocado brownies, painted some furniture, shaved my head, did the laundry, spent quality time with the people around me, and later tonight I’m going to cuddle up in bed with my love and watch a few episodes of Girls. While I somehow managed to find the perfect balance today, that is often not the case.

I often get stuck in the weird mindset of overthinking. Overthinking every little detail, worrying about what if this happens or that happens, and getting lost in my own head. I’m thinking to the point of caring way too much, and then also not caring one bit, all at the same time. I often get so overwhelmed with caring and worrying that I just don’t give a shit about anything in the end. It’s too much so I shut down until I get a much needed break to collect myself and my thoughts.

Finding a balance in life, I honestly believe, is one of the most challenging & hardest things to do. I either care too much or too little, I often work too hard or not enough, I am sleep deprived or I have overslept, I ate too much or ate too little, I exercise to the point of being faint or I sit on the couch all day. I often can’t find the balance. If I start something, I feel the need to go all out (probably too full out), or I often don’t start at all.

I guess that is my perfectionist side coming out. While I guess that are some perks to being somewhat a perfectionist, it most of the time slowly kills me. While I have been working on that part of me, attempting to find some sort of balance, it is quite a difficult and continuous challenge. Some days I’m happy and good, and other days I shut down from being so overwhelmed.

So far I have found that the biggest key in life is to always just keep on going. Don’t stress and don’t kill yourself with the many tasks in life, but just keep trying the best that you can and keep going. But with that being said, also put time aside to take care of yourself. You won’t do yourself, or the world, as much good if you are in a bad place. Take the time to take care of yourself, your body, and your mind. By taking care of yourself you will do yourself, and the world, wonders. Of course it is one of those things that is easier said than done, but hey, it’s always something to work towards.

Take care of yourself. Find the balance. 



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